CHINESE FORTUNE COOKIES
Once upon a time, back in the 1990's, in a land called America, Joe Shmoe sat down for a nice Chinese dinner with one of his friends.
After gorging himself on chow mein, sweet and sour pork, General Tsao's chicken and several eggrolls, Joe sat back and cracked open a fortune cookie. To his delight, the fortune read "you will inherit $1 billion this year". Although Joe couldn't imagine such a thing, he knew it had to be true--after all, he'd read it in a fortune cookie. For the next 12 months, Joe bought every single thing he'd ever wanted, planning to pay off the bills when his money came in.
Unfortunately, the year passed and he never saw the money. In fact, he grew deeper and deeper in debt.
With no money, no job and no hope, Joe decided his only choice was to sue the makers of the fortune cookie.
Since the company had obviously blatantly lied to this poor innocent man, they were required to pay him not only the $1 billion, but also another $975,000 for all the emotional damage he suffered.
To avoid any further lawsuits, fortune cookie makers have all decided to forget about fortunes and use cheesy motivational sayings instead.
*Made up by a friend of mine in an effort to explain to lack of fortunes in fortune cookies.
After gorging himself on chow mein, sweet and sour pork, General Tsao's chicken and several eggrolls, Joe sat back and cracked open a fortune cookie. To his delight, the fortune read "you will inherit $1 billion this year". Although Joe couldn't imagine such a thing, he knew it had to be true--after all, he'd read it in a fortune cookie. For the next 12 months, Joe bought every single thing he'd ever wanted, planning to pay off the bills when his money came in.
Unfortunately, the year passed and he never saw the money. In fact, he grew deeper and deeper in debt.
With no money, no job and no hope, Joe decided his only choice was to sue the makers of the fortune cookie.
Since the company had obviously blatantly lied to this poor innocent man, they were required to pay him not only the $1 billion, but also another $975,000 for all the emotional damage he suffered.
To avoid any further lawsuits, fortune cookie makers have all decided to forget about fortunes and use cheesy motivational sayings instead.
*Made up by a friend of mine in an effort to explain to lack of fortunes in fortune cookies.
posted by Katie80 at 6:56 PM
3 Comments:
Um, thank you? I have found that those fortune cookies never inspire me to do anything except throw the paper away and eat that delectible cookie.
I got kicked out of a chinese restaraunt along with most of my baseball team for making a joke about the fortune cookie I got to the manager of the Wok Inn
You never know if you can believe that Justin, he has some crazy stories!
Post a Comment
<< Home